What does being uneasy mean?
In short, being uneasy means you’ve stepped away from being your True Self. Who are you when you’re not your True Self? You’re then identified with your Persona, the “person” you created to deal with the expectations and demands of the physical world.
Being uneasy is a signal from your True Self to you to get yourself back in line with who you truly are. Being at ease is a signal that you are in line with who you truly are.
In this article I’m going to explain the difference between your True Self and your Persona, how being uneasy and at ease will help you navigate the two and what you can do to be at ease as often as you can.
But before I do, remember that it’s not a bad thing to feel uneasy. It’s not something that you’re doing “wrong” and that you need to “fix” yourself. You are already perfect just as you are. This is meant as a guide to help you get more insight in yourself as well as practical tips to help you feel at ease more often.
Your True Self
Your True Self is YOU without your identification with your body, your job, your house, your family and any other physical manifestation. Your True Self is non-physical and is the same as feeling good, abundant, joyful and passionate.
Have you ever felt “into” yourself? Into your “I am?” That place where you feel no doubt about yourself and you “just” ARE? If not, let’s do it together right now.
Take a deep breath in, and out. Relax your thoughts. Relax your body.
Just take some breaths like this until you feel you relax.
Until you feel you can take a break from your thoughts.
Until you feel comfortable with sitting like this.
Just breath in and out in a relaxing manner.
Instead of focusing on the thoughts that come and go, turn your attention inward.
You can visualize your attention going within your body, into the “you”.
You can visualize the greatness of you, the vastness of you. The energy of you. The “Being” of you.
What do you feel?
Do you feel something more than “just” being the name you’ve been given?
Or the body you’re inhabiting?
Do you feel more than the job you’re doing?
Can you feel yourself going beyond those and feeling into the being that you are?
Into the “I am” that you are.
Into Being?
Stay there for as long as you like. Feel into that feeling of Being.
Feel you being aware of your body and yet not truly being your body.
Feel you being aware of your fingers and toes and yet not being them.
Feel you being aware of the experiences you had today, while not being those experiences.
This is your True Self.
Your body is a physical manifestation of your True Self but it’s not your True Self. Your True Self is you but coming from a “higher” viewpoint, the non-physical. A Viewpoint from which you can oversee your entire life. Your True Self IS you but from another consciousness level. Your True Self is you in a “higher” form of consciousness guiding yourself in this physical world.
Your True Self is aware of everything you do, as well as aware of all the possibilities you bring with you. It’s aware of all the parallel experiences that are out there. For example, this morning you could’ve chosen to wear something else. Or have something else for breakfast. Or to look or not look at your phone. These choices all have parallel “realities” or “consequences”. At that time you chose for A but B could’ve have happened as well with a whole new set of consequences and experiences.
Your True Self “sees” and “knows” everything.
This might sound as if you True Self is something other than the “you” who’s reading this. But it’s not. The you who’s reading this and your True Self who sees and knows everything are ultimately the same but exist simultaneously at different consciousness levels.
The you who reads this exist in a more denser form in this physical plane, while your True Self exist in the non-physical.
Your Persona
Your Persona is your identification with your body. Your Persona comes from the misconception that YOU are your body. Which you are not.
Your Persona is:
- Like a social mask. It’s made up of our habits, behaviors and thoughts all developed in reaction to demands and expectations of the outside world and adapted to those demands and expectations.
- A “person” we create in the hopes that, rather than being our True Self, we’ll be accepted. We change who we are and how we behave so as not to feel rejected or fearful, and feel accepted and loved again.
We identify too much with our Persona and lose sight of who we truly are. As we are our True Self, we are so much more than our body and our mind. But when we are our Persona, we lose touch with that and identify too much with our body and our mind.
This isn’t something that happens overnight. This is a gradual, specific and very nuanced process. As a child we’re very sensitive to our parents, caregivers and other important people around us. Disappointments, resentments and suppressed anger experienced by them are often associated with us feeling not good enough.
We’ve become extremely adept at reading the social signs of those people around us. We are very sensitive to what other people feel, think and say. We incorporate all that we learn from this communication into our Persona. We become like a sponge, taking in the thoughts, words and beliefs of others and turning them into beliefs and thoughts that affect our own behaviors.
So for each of us, a Persona is formed in response to our environment. And that Persona will consist of behavior deemed “acceptable” in that environment. By developing our Persona we identify with it and lose touch and sight of who and what we truly are.
Emotional Guidance system.
We might lose ourselves too much in identification with our Persona, and with our body, but we never stop being our True Self. The communication from our True Self doesn’t stop either. Our True Self is always communicating to us to get us back in alignment with who we truly are.
How?
By using our emotions.
The emotional body is the communication system between Your True Self and the physical you.
The two ends of the spectrum, feeling good and feeling bad, tell you whether something is either good or bad for you.
This sounds so easy and obvious but it’s a way of “using” your emotions that is so often overlooked.
But most importantly it’s about seeing your emotions as your guidance system. We all know that “if something doesn’t feel good, you shouldn’t do it”. And in this simple and overused sentence lies so much truth we have forgotten. But on the other hand, it encompasses so much more than “simply” following your emotions. Your emotions react to thoughts coming from your (unconscious) belief and they are signaling to you whether or not that belief belongs to your True Self (feeling good) or to your Persona (feeling bad).
So when you feel shitty, that means you’re believing something not true for you. When you feel great, you’re believing something that’s true for you.
When you feel negative you come from your Persona and you’re believing beliefs not true for you. When you feel positive you are in line with your True Self and you’re believing beliefs coming from your True Self.
Learn to see your emotions as your guides. When something feels good it’s in line with who you truly all. When something feels bad, it’s not in line with who you truly are. It’s that simple.
Emotions are a good thing. Negative emotions are a good thing as well because they are like a red flag signaling you’re off track regarding your True Self. Instead of ignoring emotions or muffling them up, FEEL them.
Emotions are there to be felt. You don’t need to analyze them, just FEEL them. See them as your best friend truthfully, lovingly, and patiently telling you whether or not you’re still true to yourself.
Emotions are there to be felt – the positive as well as the negative – as they guide you through life staying true to your True Self. They are not annoying, nor scary. They are your best friend and always tell you the truth.
Your step-by-step-guide to navigating towards Being at Ease
So, now you know what being uneasy truly means, I will give you some practical steps to go from uneasy to at ease…The more you practice this, the easier it will become.
Step-be-step-guide
- Notice a negative feeling.
- Recognize that your guidance system works.
- You’re aware of the emotion so you’re not the emotion itself. If you were the emotion you would simply BE it and not notice that you’re experiencing a negative emotion.
- Right before the emotion a belief was being activated. Either by your environment or by your thinking process.
- The negative emotion is signaling to you that that belief isn’t true for who you really are.
Explanation:
- Notice a negative feeling.
Negative emotions do not define who you are. You are not your negative emotions. You becoming aware of a negative emotions means you’re not either identified or numbed by negative emotions.Oftentimes, we’re so used to our negative emotions, we don’t really feel them anymore. So you feeling a negative emotion is a GOOD thing. - Recognize that your guidance system works.
Negative emotions is like your GPS saying to you “Turn around”, “Turn around”, after taking a wrong turn. It’s signaling to you you’re stepping away from what is true for you. - You’re aware of the emotion so you’re not the emotion itself. If you were the emotion you would simply BE it and not notice that you’re experiencing a negative emotion.
This is somewhat the same as No 1. You are not identified with the emotion. That emotion comes (and will go) as is not who you truly are. - Your emotions are in response to a belief you take up towards yourself and the world, in response to something you experience or what you think.
- That belief you’re taking up is not right for who you truly are. If you switch your beliefs, you will feel good and you will know that that belief is in line with who you truly are.
Example:
- You feel scared
- You recognize that this is your True Self communicating to you that what you’re thinking isn’t true for who you really are.
- You are aware of your emotions of feeling scared and you know that you are NOT the emotion itself. It’s something that comes and will go.
- You trace that emotion back to thoughts you have in response to you learning that you will lose your job. You’re thinking “I will never be able to pay the bills”, “I will never find a good job so soon”. All this confirms to you that “you’re not good enough (Limiting Belief)
- Your True Self is communicating to you that what you’re thinking and believing isn’t true for who you really are.If you transform your belief to “I’m worthy, and capable to handle any situation” you will feel good and AT EASE and you will KNOW this is true for who you really are.
Finding your True Belief might take some time and that’s okay. Maybe at first you find it hard to believe that you’re worthy. And if you think that (a lack belief about you not being worthy) and you feel bad about it (emotional guidance system), know that it’s your True Self communicating with you that what you’re believing isn’t true for who you really are.
With every “doubt”-thought, or lack-thought and every following negative feeling, know for yourself, keep repeating to yourself, that you feeling bad about that, means it isn’t true.
And even an inkling of a good feeling following a thought of “I’m worthy” is a signal that it’s true for who you are. It’s up to you to give that inkling of a feeling more room and more space.
So, key to this guide is practice. And Practice doesn’t make Perfect. Practice makes Progression!
So keep practicing and the more you practice the more progression you make. And before you know it, you will be thinking “I’m worthy” and feeling awesome about it.
Love,
Carmen
Carmen Smallegange is a coach specialized in uncovering and transforming limiting beliefs. Using her own life lessons she shines a new and fresh light on negative experiences to empower others to do the same and to acknowledge and step into their own amazing potential. You can get her free workbook on how to transform your fears or follow her on Facebook.
Image courtesy of Tofros.com.
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